This month I’m continuing our series in honor of National Infertility Awareness Month, I’ll be sharing with you a series of posts based on my own experiences with infertility issues. Here’s a few things I learned about doing IVF.
Do’s and Don’ts of IVF
- Do not be overly optimistic or pessimistic, take things as they are, hope for the best and prepare for the worst.
- Do not attempt any other life changing events during this treatment, do not look for or accept another job, do not start college or graduate school, and do not move. Keep your life on as even keel as possible. You will need all the support and regularity in your life to help you through it.
- Do be prepared for those object to IVF based on moral or religious grounds. You may find that they are the hardest to deal with in this process. While you probably won’t share your experience with everyone, you may find that you meet resistance in unexpected places.
- Do be understanding of your spouse’s fears, concerns, reservations and abilities or inabilities during this time. Not all spouses can handle the medical side of things. Not all spouses can take off work. Understand that you both have needs and do your best to support each other throughout this endeavor.
- Do talk to people. Talk to those who have also used IVF to get pregnant. Talk to the nurses at the clinic you are using. Talk to a counselor or therapist. There are a lot of emotions that you will need to deal with over the course of this treatment such as fear, anxiety, worry, frustration, anger, disappointment, loss, happiness, excitement, euphoria and this emotions change with each passing moment. The medicines used aggravate these mood swings and make them stronger and more intense.
- Do remember this is an incredibly expensive treatment and as such you may have to make certain financial sacrifices such as: raiding your savings, retirement fund or other long term financial resources as well as cutting back on living expenses during the treatment.
- Do consult more than one doctor. Get several consultations prior to beginning your treatment. I wish that I had more options available to me, as I don’t think I would have done the IVF to begin with, but begun my treatment through the eventual successful surgical intervention.
Couples think long and hard, this is not something to enter into lightly. In some ways, I wonder if the treatment contributed to my later success, but I also wonder if it was actually worth all the sacrifices, physical, financial and emotional. In our case, we eventually were successful in our efforts to have a baby though not through IVF. Our first round was unsuccessful, our second ended in fetal demise. But after finding out about alternatives to IVF, we went in a different direction and now have our beautiful daughters to show for it.